I suppose I love this life,
in spite of my clenched fist.I know this world is far from perfect.
I am not the type to mistake a streetlight for the moon.
I know our wounds are deep as the Atlantic.
But every ocean has a shoreline
and every shoreline has a tide
that is constantly returning
to wake the songbirds in our hands,
to wake the music in our bones,
to place one fearless kiss on the mouth of that brave river
that has to run through the center of our hearts
to find its way home.
from Birthday by Andrea Gibson (via withnailrules)
This is just beautiful. Sometimes you read something and it hits you right where your soul meets bone. Like this. Here I am with clenched fists, frustrated, sad, realistic and yet hopeful… the ebb and flow of life, along with my help, will get me where I need to be. I need to be patient, but my sense of urgency gets the better of me sometimes.
Some things are out of my control, and there is nothing for it, except embracing the moment. There are beautiful moments everywhere, that I need to appreciate. Small things, that are big. Like my daughter giving me a kiss at dinner for no reason, her mouth all covered in taco sauce. The incredible amount of noise that happens at the dinner table when everyone tries to talk at once and the number of times I have to say, “Take a moment, chew your food, swallow and then tell me.” Alternating with, “Don’t talk with your mouth full. Please.” I lost count tonight. Then conversely, sitting down with a cup of earl grey, a bittersweet playlist that tugs at my heart, and the quiet of the house (with the exception of my dog snoring).
I sent Him (I really need a name to call him on here…Steve?) a google chat IM, being kind of snarky. Cheeky. But haven’t heard anything back from him. He sent me a good morning message and asked me how my day was going, which I responded to, asking how his was going, but all was quiet. Yes, I recognize the insanity in this. This street light is no moon, and yet here I am staring at it like a crazy person.