My friend, Kinky K, posted this to my facebook. 

She has been really frustrated watching me struggle with my feelings – them not being reciprocated, battling my self esteem. She kicks my ass about it. If she were here right now, She would undoubtedly say, “Jesus fucking Christ Bec – you have gotten through everything life, and that asshole fucker ex have thrown at you, *and* you have created a real life for yourself with freedom, and your beach house future. Stop whining, and flopping all over the fucking place. Jesus.” 🙂  She is the tough love corner. Someday I hope to sit in her kitchen, drink wine and have her teach me some of her favourite vegan dishes. We can even yoga it up together – sun salutations in the front yard, bitches!

Here’s what she sent (oh! and bit of trivia about me – I’m a taurus born in the Chinese year of the bull. Ruh-roh.):

NEW MOON Solar ECLIPSE in Taurus May 9th – 10th 2013~

“Eclipses mark times of cosmic redirection and energy shifts…Something we’ve imagined and dreamed about begins to manifest at a solar eclipse.

This Taurus solar eclipse on May 9-10th marks a new beginning, an especially fertile new beginning as it takes place in the astrological sign of manifestation. Taurus is the most earthy of earth signs, marking a season of fertility and growth, of beauty and sensuality. It is the energy of building and making, of new possibilities and passions.

Solar eclipses mark the end of a 19-year cycle relating to the activities relevant to each astrological sign. A Taurus solar eclipse brings up issues of self-worth and values. Since this eclipse is near the South Node of the Moon, we might have to examine old value systems that no longer serve our lives. Do you honor the talents you have? Do you know what values stand at the center of your life? Take time to dig deep in the soils of Taurus and weed out any old negative behavior patterns entrenched there. Prepare the soil for new growth.

When we know our own worth, we can also access to the archetypal realm of Beauty, Desire and Fertility which is ruled by Venus/Aphrodite. Know what you value in this precious life we have, because why build something you don’t value? …Plant the seed of that new desire during this potent New Moon.

Venus/Aphrodite, the Goddess of Love, Beauty, Wisdom, Sexuality and Wholeness rules Taurus. Just hours before the solar eclipse, Venus leaves her home in Taurus and moves into Gemini, the sign of the Mind….

What beliefs about your feminine Self need to die so that a new vision of Feminine Spirit can arise and live through you?

…It can be a time of healing, when you realize that your loneliness and isolation was an incubation, a time of preparation. Be willing to ‘lose your familiar self for the promise of a greater, more encompassing reality’ where you can use your feminine gifts to change the world.

Transmutation occurs from the inside out. Let the light of your inner feminine Being shine into the world in conscious and conscientious ways. ’Transmutation forces us to serve who we are becoming, beyond who we’ve been: ‘trans (beyond) mutate (change)’. Become intimate with yourself, so that you can be intimate with others.

This Venus-ruled solar eclipse asks us to look to the future: ‘personal power results from mastering the illusion of our fear through open-heartedness.’ When we open to our original blessings, we discover that the feminine values of Love, Wisdom and Beauty can help us through the darkest times. Stop doing for a while and let your being shine through.”

Cathy Pagano | Artwork by Elena Ray