From my one of my oldest friends… we met in honors English. She wrote this just before Christmas. I asked her today if I could share it:
I know personally, when I feel concerned about you ending up alone, it’s not because Boy Name/Misty is who s/he is. It’s more because I know that your heart is such a huge part of who you are, and your need, and capacity, to love and be loved is enormous. As positive as your relationship with Boy Name/Misty is, I just wonder if, in the future, you may feel you are missing something – namely, a partner who loves you the way you love them. Not that there is anything wrong with the way you are cherished by Misty/BoyName, but just because there is a difference that you may eventually come to long for.Having said that, I dont really worry that you’ll end up alone. You have always had the ability to attract love – friendship, family, and lovers – and that won’t change anytime soon. I have no doubt that you will in time meet someone who loves you but who also shares your outlook and your, ahem, interests. 🙂 And of course the beauty of your lifestyle is that Misty/Boy Name can still be in your life when that happens.So, that’s what I think. 🙂
This is so bitter/sweet for me. S/he has talked about that too – me finding someone else. It always feels like s/he is pushing me away. Even though I know s/he is saying that because s/he wants to have everything I want and not ever feel hemmed in. But that’s not how it *feels*. It feels terrible and thoughtful all at the same time. Bitter and sweet.
I have found that I do long for her/him to love me. But that is something that I have no control over.