Life is wonderful, funny, ironic, occasionally a bitch (but aren’t we all), short, and breath-taking.

I’m in a poly relationship with a woman (who’s a man and visa versa) with his/her wife.  We’re talking time sharing and rules, and I feel out of my element and all I can do is move forward with honesty as my offering. The wife has  been sharing him/her with multiple partners for many years, but I am happy to report that I am different. Sadly that is no comfort for her/his wife – in fact it has had just the opposite affect. Remember my post from yesterday – do no harm – well, I am doing my damnedest. I don’t know how to make this better…

We had a good chat today about it. I cried. The wife feels I am looking to steal her husband – which I find just harsh and unfair. I totally get all her feelings though. All I want to do is share, in loving way, where we all get along. I don’t know where this road goes, but I am all in favour of Utah. Me and my Utopian fantasy of all of us living together.   Come on, a girl can dream!

S/he is *one* amazing person – despite the use of both pronouns. I don’t compartmentalize his/her personalities. S/he is a whole person.  S/he is as multifaceted as they come – it’s like the universe said, “You want someone who is many things, you say…? Brace for impact…” I could not have, even if the gods themselves had handed me the tools, have made someone who fits me so well… a Diva and bad boy, who’s list of kinks rivals my own. In fact, s/he keeps inspiring new ones… the delicious dirty thing. 

So as I said, right now we are negotiating time – how much are Misty and I allowed to have. 50 days a year? With allowances to have a few days in a row, down the road? Kissing has been allowed (thank god!) but I am not allowed to receive oral from her. Which sucks. It is, without any doubt, the strangest negotiation (not that I really have any say) that I have been apart of. It feels surreal. S/he and I discussed time… how much can we really ask for? What is a reasonable amount? Honestly, it felt awful to have to put a number to it, but if I want any at all I need to go along with this odd dance, and if it helps put the wife at ease with me, really and honestly, then it will be worth it. I would really love to be on a friendly basis with her. 

Oh! Life is also an adventure… one I am happily, charging into. As I used to say to my friend Sue… in a hundred years we’ll all be dead anyway.